10:05am

well i took your advice&let myself have some fun with my sister. i think my favorite part of the trip was going to garden of the gods. at the end of the trail there was a sign that said "warning: serious injuries&fatalities have occurred beyond this point. play it safe-stay off the rocks" seriously? is that a dare? so we climbed waaay past it. example:

ignore my huge legs. but it was so fun. one part was tricky. crazy steep with bats living in the wall on our left. another fun part was just driving up the mountain. you know, where there's a rock wall on one side&a dropoff on the other? the greatest. there were parts that weren't great. met up with my brother-in-law's old buddy J. he's an ass. one of those guys who talks about nothing but getting laid, yet so ugly that all you can think about is "what blind old grump would fuck you?" cause of my braces, he named me "ugly betty" &proceeded to call me so for the duration of his stay. i pretended it didn't bother me. i even put on my glasses, said an ugly betty line, &laughed with him. wrong move, apparently, cause then he called me fat. just a couple times a day. but i did wait for everyone to fall asleep&then inspect every inch of my body in front of the mirror in the bathroom. that turned out to be a good thing. motivated me to eat less while i was there. lost 2 pounds&gained 1. boo. &now i'm home. 

i really don't like being home. first of all, it's in the high 90's here. i stepped out of the airport&melted instantly. but surprise was happy to see me. i was walking from the baggage claim when i spotted my mother with my dog on the leash. so i called her&everybody "awww"ed at our little moment. unfortunately, my mother ignored what i said about keeping my kitten indoors at all times&let her outside. she told me she has a "sore" on the back of her neck. by sore she means gash. it was healing but i cleaned it, which made it itch, which made her scratch, which made the scab start peeling. fail. i feel bad for my kitty. if i had any money i'd take her to the vet. instead, i'm going to get ginormosaurus bandaids to cover it. on the bright side, it looks disgusting. totally killed my appetite. i'd post a picture but i don't want those of you with sensitive stomachs to lose your carefully planned breakfast.

but now that i'm home, i can focus on one thing:shrinking. my dramatic friend says i act this way cause i want to disappear. she tends to put meaning into things that don't have any meaning at all. she's just one of those people who could ask "why?" over&over until you say "just because". but in a way she has zero grasp of being sensitive. she's as blunt&stubborn as i am. so she practically jokes about me not eating&i don't tell her but it hurts my feelings big time. boo for insensitive people. fuck. after that wad of rambling, thinspo:

or:

just saying. it's alright to whine about being big. but just be sure to restrict&exercise, too. whining doesn't actually burn many calories. &please don't give me shit for the bony thinspo. i like it. kapeesh? wow, apologies for the bitchy attitude. hang in there, lovelies.

xoxo

zette