September 13, 2010

7:17pm

what's new? well, c's mother is home under hospice. so...they're pretty much waiting for her to die. my friend overdosed saturday. she died sunday morning. that's what sucks about the party scene. different people, same cycle. i've watched people i met in church become sluts to pay for their favorite whatever. people get shot, overdose, kill themselves, wreck their cars. etc. &yet i miss it. i want so bad to go to a party&get completely wasted the way i used to. but i shouldn't.
i went running last night. it was good. except my feet hurt like hell. yes, i'm still cutting. stupid stupid stupid me. &sorry for disappearing. things are just kind of shitty lately..hopefully i'll be back soon. don't get fat in my absence.


they look so young. they're my age. the redhead looks great. &the brunette, too, though i highly doubt she's naturally that color. stay strong, lovelies.

xoxo
zette
p.s. down two pounds. hoping to drop 8 or 10 more before my friend from oregon gets here in october.

11 comments:

  1. Hey lady, im sorry life is so rough right now. :( Life always sucks at some point... but stay strong, and text me if you need some encouragement, love, or distraction. At least your not stuffing your face from emotional eating. <3

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  2. i'm so sorry about everything. i hope you feel better soon xx

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  3. i'm sorry dear.
    hang in there.

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  4. i know how you feel about the part scene i used to be in it too. all it is is death, you dont need it

    lot of love

    p.s i'm glad your back

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  5. hope in your next post you're telling everything is fine!
    take care of yourself and stay strong through this whole shitty thing you're into :)

    xoxo

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  6. zette! I'm so sorry! Hang in there, just do what you have to do :) Hope things can look up in some way!
    I have missed your posts!
    Love!!
    xx

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  7. i wish to death i was as smart as you, i dont miss the party scene because i havent left it. you are an inspiration.

    just know that regardless of how shitty everything in life is, all you have to do is come on here and know that there are a ton of people who realize how lovely you are. life is a cycle, it ALWAYS gets better, and it always gets worse. atleast when its shitty we always have something better to look forward to becaus things have to turn around eventually. so i hope that the better part swings around for you sometime soon, you deserve it.

    keep your head up girl.

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  8. im sorry about your friend, and this seems kinda pointless to say but i will anyway ... please dont cut yourself.

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  9. Oh my! I feel so selfish now for wanting you back! But you've got your own shit to deal with and I totally respect that. Sometimes I forget that you bloggers actually have lives...Congrats on the weightloss. Hope much more for you. You'll bounce back--I know you will <3

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  10. I'm sorry about your friend. may she rest in peace. And don't be sad depressed okay we're all here to give you all the support you need and good luck on your lost. Loves.. <3

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  11. I'm terribly sorry about your friend. They'll be in my prayers..
    And I completely understand the party scene, I'm in it and it's kinda hard to get out of.
    I was taken advantage of, at a party. Didn't know what was going on; so fucked up. Every day it's hard enough with ana telling me things, and now I always have it in the back of my mind.
    Just know that you are so beautiful. I'm not jsut saying this either. You deserve to be so happy, and I know things are real rough right now, but you're so strong, I know you can make it through.
    I'll always be here if you need someone to talk to. Hope things look up for you ♥

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